Thursday, February 15, 2007

and the innocent shall inherit the earth..

I know that most of you drop by here for a little light relief, however today has been a rather difficult day and as some of you may not know me very well I thought that perhaps it was time that you got to know me a little better.

For those who are not aware, I work with the 'morally challenged'. I regularly deal with petty theives, burglars, drug dealers, violence, murderers and rapists, although the last two thankfully are more on a 'weekly' basis. I come into contact with case information that is graphic and at times disturbing.

However there is a particular case at the moment which has deeply affected not only myself but my co workers. My friends over here in the UK will I have no doubt heard about it, involving a beautiful child, just a baby, whose cherubic face would melt any heart, (or so I innocently thought), and whose smile I am sure would light up any room. Not anymore. This child was raped and murdered by a close family member.

Some people would assume that dealing with such people on a daily basis makes you immune to the 'normal' human reactions and emotions when confronted which such an aborhition. Well you are wrong. Yes to some extent we do have to switch off, but we never stop caring, we never stop being 'human'. We do, though have to develop strategies to deal with our emotions, otherwise we would all be lettuce limp and incapable of performing and the public would not thank us for that. One such strategy is to 'bury' our emotions, on occasions, such as this you bury them deep. The problem with that is that they are still there, and they can erupt at any time. I had one such moment today.

Nothing I did today could prevent this outburst, but I did my best to hide it. Knowing full well that it would end in tears I headed for the Ladies. I sat inside my cubicle and quietly sobbed my heart out, I had no choice, as a Mother and a Grandmother, my heart was breaking. Then as I tried to compose myself I heard the sound of muffled sobs from the cubicle next to me. Composing myself I opened the door and went to wash my hands. The door next to me opened and out walked one of my team. Neither of us spoke but at that moment we both knew what the other was going through. Instinctively we hugged one another giving and taking the support that we needed. That done we checked our faces in the mirror and walked smiling back into the office.

Tonight as you tuck your babies into their beds, remember to kiss them gently and tell them that you love them. Reassure them that there are no monsters hiding under the bed, but remember as their parents that those same monsters may lurk close by. But above all I ask that you remember this little angel, remember her brief life, don't let her become just another entry in the registrars dusty tome. She deserved so much more.


Normal service will be resumed tommorow... excuse me it has been a 'trying' day.

14 at confession:

Nikki said...

St Jude.

I'll remember this little girl tonight in my prayers..and my kids will get extra hugs and kisses.

...and this may not be the best time, or the best place...but I hope the bastard that did it suffers long.

Kevin Charnas said...

... ... St. Jude... I'm sending my prayers to you, to the little girl's family...to...

I'm rather speechless. I'm sorry. I'm sick to my stomach

and I'm sorry...

(((((((((St. Jude))))))))

Mamma said...

I usually very much a pacifist. But when it comes to people who harm children...

You are a saint indeed to deal with such sub-humans!

A prayer for the beautiful girl and a prayer for you and your colleagues.

Take your time. We'll wait.

Anita said...

Oh my goodness ... you are such a strong person to be able to deal with this type of tragedy on a regular basis!

Dorky Dad said...

I have no idea how you deal with that. I had a hard enough time reading this post ... ugh.

But bless you for working with these folks, anyway. Many people couldn't do it.

Beth said...

In your job you bear the unbearable and deal with the unthinkable. Your tears were a release for you and a testimonial of grief, sorrow and remembrance for that precious baby.
No matter where my “babies” are in the world, they are hugged, kissed and loved by their mother. Tonight I am including that little girl in my loving and hugs. And having a little cry of my own, because what happened to her is so wrong — so very, very wrong.
Take care.

kim said...

I'll say extra prayers for you... and for the little angel too
I'm so very sorry these monsters even exist ... im speechless

digi-birder said...

Yes, I saw this story on the main news and our local news, and it is truly unbelievable how anyone can do this sort of thing. Whatever it is that goes through their minds to enable them to be capable of something so horrific is beyond me, especially to one so young and with such an angelic face. Where was her mother during all this, is what I was wondering.

100 Words said...

So, as days go, not a good one ... hope you're okay

Stinkypaw said...

It's not easy to be human at times... Thank you for sharing and hope you'll feel better - I'm sending you and that baby good thoughts. Big hug.

St Jude said...

Thank you everyone for your thoughts and prayers, especially for the loss of a beautiful child.

Digi-birder, it would be easy to condemn the mother for leaving her child with someone 'like that', but remember most of us at some time have left out children with people we trust... close family members.

Diesel said...

So now I see why you are called St. Jude. I'm so sorry. Thanks for doing what you do.

Attila The Mom said...

Oh Jude, I'm so sorry. :-(

Marymurtz said...

This little angel is in our prayers. I have to go hold my daughter's hand and watch her sleeping now. Sometimes this world is too terribly sad--thank you for reminding us of what is important.

 
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